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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Sat Jun 24, 2017 10:37 pm 
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Never Below, Never Above, Always Beside.

First of all, apologies. I said it was Savanna who took on Loton last night and it was Isabelle who did. It’s all that bleached blonde hair which causes confusion.

Having not forgotten last night’s encounter with her, Lotan extremely offensive to Isabelle. Apparently she hasn’t the intellect to talk to him; she complains he’s patronising, he retorts she shouldn’t make it easy for him etc etc
I’m pleased to report that Isabelle is unmoved.

In the DR, Loton claimed Isabelle only wanted to be seen. She makes statements without anything to back them up.

Her attitude to him is not worshipful. That really puts his nose out of joint.

The task tonight involved Hms trying to outdo one another in varius categories – the most talented, the most outrageous etc etc The game was actually quite amusing. Then the sexiest HM competition took place. Loton and Isabelle competed. Both elected to perform some dirty dancing. Loton brought Ellie into his act since obviously the men wouldn’t be all that interested in him. He stroked and caressed, pretended to kiss, got out the suncream, stuch her had down his jeans more than once. She looked a little uncomfortable, I thought. Certainly was. Then he simulated sex on the grass. It was a tacky performance really.
Isabelle gave it her best go, flashing her thong, pretending to strip, nothing too daring. She fell over at one point (wedge heels) but the men liked her! And the women did too.
In the end, she did the unforgiveable thing and came equal to Loton in the competition.
He actually pouted. How dare she was written all over his face. He’s a professional!

BB sent for Loton to reprimand hi for his behaviour last night – he would not leave the bedroom when asked, had behaved in an intimidating way, and his friends had to hold him back from Cannelle.
Loton argued every point and kept talking across BB. Then he announced he wanted to go home.
Oh, dear – the dirty dancing was meant to be a bit of lightheartd fun.

He left the DR and told Tom and Kieran that he was leaving. They were practically in tears. ‘It’s just that I’m up against a wall,’ he said.

BB gave a party as a reward for doing so well in the task. Joe proposed a toast; never below, never above, always beside.
(unless you’re not in their clique, of course. Unles you cut acroos Loton).

It was time for spin the bottle but it didn’t get very far. Channelle asked Kieran who was the better shag= Rebeeca or Isabelle- in her inimitable way and he reused to answer. She sulked. Then Loton was asked about his love life and straight away Channelle was in there with I don’t want to hear about your bloody ex-girlfriend AGAIN.’ Isabelle giggled Wounded, Lotoan walked away. His entourage followed him and he ranted at them about his emotional wounds, being laughed at for something that was precious to him and so on.

In the DR, he continued exploring his pain and attacked Isabelle for laughing at him.
(first he doesn’t win the dirty dancing competition then he gets laughed at. Too much for a fragile ego in one day). Suddenly he started breathing heavily as if he were having a cardiac arrest but it was only him struggling with his emotions.

Savanna left Rose Cottage because she felt Loton was hard done by and Isabelle was defensive. Big mistake – the nation loathes him, this man who cannot bar to be contradicted and picks on Hannah because she dared to and Isabelle too for the same reason. He’s very vindictive. But Savanna told Loton about Isabelle’s attitude. Nasty.
Loton was wounded again in the emotions and entered the bedroom with his entourage yet again. Channelle protested as they approached Isabelle’s bed – five againt one, she cried, and wouldn’t have it. The others left.

Loton packed and lectured Isabelle, explained his hurt and pain, warned her that pride goeth before a fall…
Isabelle did not apologise, in fact was quite indifferent to his maunderings.
Meanwhile, Channelle tackled Ellie for being part of the mob who surged into the bedroom.

Loton promised Isabelle that he would keep his friends back room her. ‘I don’t care,’ she announced and meant t.

As good as his word, Loton snapped his fingers in the room next door and instructed his team to stay away from Isabelle. He was choked with emotion about this girl who would not apologise and started on his emotional trauma again. They were like a pack of dogs coming to heel!

After awhile, he attacked the fire exit and tried to escape. Ellie wept and members of the entourage tried to follow hi – Loton could be heard screaming ‘No! No!’

He wound up back in the DR and said he was now going to stay – for the sake of his friends. When he returned to the house, Tom leapt joyfully on him and Kieran came for a group hug. Gravely he told them that he wants to go but must stay for their sakes.
What a big girl’s blouse!


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Mon Jun 26, 2017 12:12 am 
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Any Man Would Have Done The Same

Isabelle has been sent to Coventry by his merry band on Lotan;s orders. After all, she did not apologise o him for her outrageous answering back to him and coming first equal in the sexy dancing competition.

Deborah and Hannah are not pleased tat Lotan has returned after promising to go. I don’t blame them in the slightest. Last night Tom threw a naked Lotan on top of Savanna and shoved his genitals in her face. Savanna lost kudos for telling BB that it was a case of boys will be boys. She should have raised hell at this very ugly prank. But she joined the Lotan clique last night – I guess this is the price she pays, And she should not, she really should not, pay it. Tom got a formal warning nonetheless but he should have been evicted for that.

Isabelle entered the kitchen and all studiously avoided talking to her while Lotan whistled tunefully to show his unconcern.
More ugly behaviour.

Savanna, in an effort to impress the clique, told them about her celebrity lifestyle in New York. She was in a celebrity café and saw Justin Bieber – yes, really she did. Lotan sniggered and insisted she must have slept with Bieber The price ou pay, Savanna.

In the living room, Lotan bragged about how bright his son is and how he lacks focus so has been given another teacher in the classroom to help him concentrate.

Hmmm- I think he means he has a classroom assistant in with him. And not because he’s super bright and advanced.

Joe advised Raph to be objective when rows broke out because rows can be escalated when other people join in.

Nominations took place tonight but for reasons which will soon become apparent I won’t say much about them except that Isabelle got a shed load and so did Lotan and Tom. The result was that Hannah, Lotan. Tom and Isabelle have all been nominated.

Tonight’s task was bound to cause truble. HMs were issued with stickers advertising personality traits. HMs had to stick the appropriate label to the HM of their choice. Lotan was nasty and sneering to everyone who put a label on him and talked over others in the game, causing BB to request silence so that they could play the game
but he was ignored. Several arguments broke out because of this but Lotan sat smirking and making nasty remarks. Finally Isabelle lost patience and remarked that he was no role model for his son. Lotan exploded (she’s answering back again) and threw his drink at her but Channelle and Hannah got the worst of it. He followed thatby throwing a beer bottle across the room. Hannah ignited. Channelle went nuclear. Deborah was enraged.

Big Brother kept calling Lotan to the DR but Lotan refused to comply, challenging BB to come and get him.. Meanwhile the girls rose as one and screamed and shouted abuse at him. Finally security came and got him upstairs, Ellie standing guard on the stairs with Charlotte to stop the other girls coming after him. The other HMs milled about at the bottom of the stairs shouting at one another, at Lotan, at everybody.

Deborah actually sprang up the stairs towards Ellie and Xharlotte, Deborah says Ellie hit her on the eye in the fracas.

In the DR, Lotan sat in the protective embrace of Tom taking no nonsense from BB about his behaviour. He only did what any man would do, he said with his hand on is heart. Whenever BB tried to speak he got up and fled the DR, leaving Tom Thumb indignant on his behalf. When he returned to te DR he tod BB that either Isabelle left or he would.

Ellie and Charlotte complained about Deborah’s aggression. Hannah announced that she was leaving the house. The one amusing part of the evening was the sight of Raph trying to persuade Hannah and Deborah to stay. He was fratic at the thought of losing two of his team.

The sisters felt that BB condones the aggression of Lotan, leaving them no choice but to leave. They’re right but it was clever play too.

Lotan admitted that he was immature but he downplayed the drink incident – there were only a few drops fell on the girls. He threatened to destroy either Hannah or Isabelle physically and mentally an claimed to have been intimidated and persecuted for being male. Anyone would have done the same as he did…

It gave me the shudders, actually, thinking of what he might be like towards women outside the house. BB had done his magic – the real personality stood exposed.

In the end, Lotan was not given the choice to stay or go – he was removed for displaying aggressive behaviour, for not responding to BB

How will Ellie react?
How will poor little Tom get on without his master’s voice?

And what will BB do about others who have misbehaved? Did Ellie punch Deborah’s eye? Will Tom’s devoted support of Lotan involve him in the eviction fiasco?

Anyway, this week’s nominations are cancelled and all the HMs are up for eviction this week.


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Mon Jun 26, 2017 11:53 pm 
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Love, Peace and Harmony

Tonight was an evening of peace and harmony – Big Brother saw to that.

Hannah was called to the |DR to be told that Ellie had not in fact hit her – having reviewed the footage, it was clear that she had been hurt in the general melee on the stairs. Hannah brushed that aside. She told Big Brother that she was a queen, in the house for a purpose, representing all women.
That was nearly as baffling as Tom’s coded conversation.

Downstairs, Savanna was expounding a theory to the disheartened Lotanless boys of the clique – the other group are in a conspiracy to make them look like bullies And Joe, that model of good manners, was telling Kieran that he despises people who won’t apologise. Isabelle and Channelle agreed that Lotan was the root of all trouble in the house.

Channelle noted with approval that Isabelle was vibrating with positivity. This caused Channelle to deliver a lecture on positivity to the house. She instructed the HMs to pay one another compliments and breathe positivity in and negativity out.

Savanna, Kieran and Tom, doubtless eager to avoid the deep breathing exercises, were talking in the tea room. Savanna told them it was vital that their group stick together. Channelle overheard them and fled back to the garden where in her haste to escape the negative vibes, she fell over.

BB lectured the assemble HMs on their disobedience and disregard for the rules of the house.
That’s rich coming from BB who supplies the booze and the psychological games designed to stir up conflict.
HMs instantly began to mend fences, notably Hannah and Deborah, who went round various HMs explaining their lack of control last night and then hugging them.

Raph, like Savanna, was thinking of his clique and tried to recruit brainless Ellie by telling her how alike that were and how he’d always thought they would get on. Ellie agreed, Gd elp her, and confessed she’s scared herself last night. Raph was very understanding.

For tonight’s task, the house was transformed into a sixties style hippie commune. They all dressed in the stye of the era and learned to chant the mantra ‘I am at one with the Big Brother House’ on demand.
HMs had to perform a positive deed _ Deborah chose to hug everyone; Ellie will tell jokes to cheer them up; Hannah will sing to enliven their spirits – this last was a double edged sword as she knows that they cannot stand the ear splitting yelling she calls singing.

Two HMs had to be touching the Tree of Love at all times. \To pass te times, Charlotte discussed vaginas with her tree partner.
I preferred her when she kept her mouth shut.

In the DR, both Deborah and Channelle were told off for ther behaviour. Deborah tried to deny that she chased Ellie and Charlotte up the stairs= she insisted that she was only trying to leave the house but BB wasn’t buying it. She got a foral warning. Channelle was penitent and was let off with a ticking off for throwing a glass on the floor. It’s not the first time she’s thrown something – she had earned more than a ticking off.

Ellie, in the DR, laughed for joy at the peace and harmony now reigning in the house.. She calle herself a hiipypotamus and thought she was hilarious.

Deborah told Kieran that he should speak out more ften like he had the night before but he says that people don’t listen orif they listen they make assumptions about what you mean.
Very Delphic.

So the hats and shades of the sixties were donned, peace and love were everywhere and I’m just waiting for Charlie Manson to appear.


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Tue Jun 27, 2017 11:51 pm 
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The Summer Of Love

The house was still in the era of flower power and tinted granny glasses. Raph giggled a lot and played pranks with Channelle –putting aa dummy in a bed and jumping on people from behind a door. It was notable that Raph encouraged there acts but stool well back while Channelle carried them ut..Channelle’s klaxon laugh coupled with Raph’s trilling giggles was surreal./

The first part of the shopping task tonight was to have a campfire singalong with songs written by HMs about HMs included. THey were told the songs had to be positive.
They were positive, but very very noisy. I was glad when the singing was over.The ne sour note was when Isabelle addressed her song to Chantelle instead of Channelle. A sulk hung across the garden like a little black cloud.

Under the Tree of Love, Isabelle and Savanna discussed the tribulations associated with fake tan: takes ages to apply it and then it washes off in the shower and then you have to apply all over again.
Oh, life is grim, life is earnest.

In the DR, Channelle declared that she was drained by so much positivity although she’s delighted with her caveman fur outfit.

The summer of love festival was next on the agenda. They got to play with body paints and glitter while swaying to the music of the sixties.

In the DR, Elie, Channelle and Isabele, deprived of the fun of being abusive and brawling, compared breasts and shoogled them about.
Downstairs, the men were blowing bubbles.

Under the Treeof Lve, his face all glittered up, Tom confessed he missed his girlfriend and hoped all was good on the outside.

Rasph was somewhat overhelmed to findhimself the focus of the girl’s attention He must have realised that there is a shortage of men in there. Joe’s too old; Kieran is involved in the Rebecca?Isabelle mess: tom is… well, somewhat odd. So Raph, you’re it: they’ll shoogle theirboobs for you, do lap dances, bare all – in the hope of getting a sex scene and winning the show.
I suspect they’ll have no luck there.

Kieran and Isabelle spoke of love. Isaelle admitted that she would like a steady relationship and a family. On the spot she decided that she would find a man I Marbella this year in Marbella..

Charlotte finally spoke tonight – a volley of curses and swear words when she found a grape down the back of her shorts.

Kieran tried to be lively by diving on Hannah and Deborah in bed.
When he’d gone, Hannah thanked the Lord Jesus and God for her daily blessings.

Raph tried for some intellectual conversation and then spoiled it all by admitting he had voted for Trump, much to everyone else’s disapproval.

The most exciting part of the show was when the girls were under the ToL and started screaming about a red dragon in the garden. That turned out to be a rather large moth fluttering gently by. Kieran trapped it but it got away.

Dear, oh dear – they are somewhat rudderless without the great God Lotan to love (or the Evil One Loton to hate depending on which side of the house you are on) but new alliances and and enemies will soon be made.


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Wed Jun 28, 2017 4:12 pm 
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Hope BB is proving enjoyable, Marion.
I thought. I would intervene here just to say that I reviewed today one of your stories here:
https://dflewisreviews.wordpress.com/20 ... ment-10097
I of course mean every word. Utterly utterly brilliant.

_________________
MY WEBSITE: www.nemonymous.com


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Thu Jun 29, 2017 12:28 am 
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I don't know that 'enjoy' is the right word here, Des - some of it has been very good - tonight was was more a fascination with the abomination!

Thanks for the review - it's always nice to get a positive one.


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Thu Jun 29, 2017 12:28 am 
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The Friends That Wee Together…

BB is still in Flower Power land, but the enforced positivity and peace and love aura is causing some HM’s to crack. Joe, supposed to chant the harmony mantra actually snarled and swore – it must be hard to be happy on command, especially with people you’ve been brawling with for weeks. All was not well under the Tree of Love either. Hannah slept through the mantra and Joe’s desperate attempts to get her attention. She actually screamed ‘leave me alone!’

Isabelle was tasked by BB to become the spiritual guru to the group, advising HM s how to achieve spiritual enlightenment and therefore become better HM. She was to interview the HMs one by one and make up her own questions to ask. That was never going to end well.

Channelle and Isabelle swapped stories about sex with the men in their lives. They were extremely graphic and so we’ll move on from that except to say that they appear to have met some gross failures to partner. Channelle came back to the subject of Isabelle and Kieran, wanting details of what she had done with him. It’s not the first time she’s asked – she’s likea dog with a bone when it comes to other people’s sex lives.

Guru Isabelle later interviewed HMs.She asked them all the same two questions – would they, if given the offer, take hald the prize money and leave the house? And ho would they evict if they could?They al denied they’d take the money and run, Kieran in spectacular fashion, composing a whole speech as he went along.(he later told the other HMs that he suspected a conspiracy ie Isabelle gathering information for her own ends. He did not explain further.) Joe, on the other hand, avoided answering the questions at all and ended up interviewing Isabelle = she really isn’t the smartest knife in the drawer.

The serious stuff of the evening over, HMs fell to discussing their sexual exploits (what else?) From removal of clothes to post-coital calm takes Kieran a whole three minutes, the actual act lasting 15 seconds. Joe hastened to reassure him that with practice he’ll last longer – like racehorses. All present becme extremely graphic – Channelle was like the cat that stole the cream = she’s been angling for this conversation throughout the series.

BB announced that the group had failed the Flower Power task because of rule breaks = Ellie Kieran and Hannah did not always chant the mantra and left the Tree of Life unattended on occasion.
So, basic food etc for a wek. Kieran instantly went and stashed some bottles of beer – does he think BB didn’t notice?

Raph was pleased about the basic budget – it will make them appreciate the luxury budget when they get it back. (This guy is too sweet to be wholesome).. Ellie also looked on the bright side – the week ahead will help her lose weight/

HMs then got back to sex partners again. |Kieran claimed a tally of 350 and a number – did he really say 17/- of STDs. It then transpired that Isabelle had caught one from him on their Ibiza encounter (in 16 seconds?)which she is still angry about.
Delightful boys and girls, aren’t they?

In the garden, Joe teased Deborah about having a crush on Kierasn. She laughed and said she didn’t, he had a boy’s face not a man’s. Butshe was coy…


Isabelle and Channelle displayed their bottoms above the water line in the hot tub, all the time looking to see if the men were watching. Then they happily peed together in the tub. Raph (fast losing brownie points with me) stood there inanely giggling. Savanna came out to join them in the tub but made a quick exit when Raph, still giggling, told her what had gone on. Channelle looked offended as if to sask what’s wrong with my wee? But contented herself by claiming it was good for your skin.

Inside, they went on to play truth or dare – Ellie had to simulate sex with Kieran – shouldn’t take long.
Channelle had to rub her bare breasts in Isabelle’s face.

This show is so appalling, with such appalling with such appaling HMs that it actually fascinates.

It all ended o a high note – Isabelle wet the bed.
We’re spoiled for choice when it comes to eviction tomorrow night.


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Thu Jun 29, 2017 11:03 pm 
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Miss Nigeria UK

Hannah and Ellie were very concerned about going on to basic rations – stock cubes and seasonings were retained.
Can you make chickpeas palatable with a touch of tarragon and a stock cube?

In the DR, Isabelle bemoaned the lack of sweet things in this week’s shopping’ She also requested a tube of fake tan – Kiss In The Dark to be precise.
BB put her very firmly in her place.

Tom decided to make an omelette for himself and Joe. There were howls of outrage from the others at using up their food supply. In the end, it was Savannah who made an omelette – Joe wanted toshow her the trick of flipping it over but it landed on the floor.
More waste.

Channelle ran a small exercise class for some HMs. One of the exercises was a back streth/leg lift. – they had to go on all fours like a dogand lift a leg as if they were a dog peeing.
That was taking a chance considering Channelle’s history.

Ellie was given an opportunity by BB to win a takeaway for the house. She had to succeed in making 5 HMs yelp to win.
She won with Tom’s help – so much for basic rations. I so want them to suffer!

For some reasom, BB has revealed how the public vote is going. This is definitely tampering with thw process. I wonder why anyone would vote now – it used to be exciting but this took the thrill out of it.

Isabelle, unhappy about her Kiss In The Dark, consented to a makeover from Hannah. Gunge was removed from her face, more subtle makeup applied – she’s really quite pretty. Not that the others would tell her so…Isabelle herself thought she looked cheap. Oh, to see ourselves as others see us!

Joe taught Tom some Spanish phrases, rather vulgar ones I suspect. Tom’s insistence on repeeating the word Papa was a little disturbing.

The task tonight was to pluck at random a question from Big Brother’s Box and and answer it attributing it to the appropriate HM.
(Not one of these personality things again!) For example, the question might be ‘Who do you think is the most likely HM to have a showmance to win the prize?
It produced the usual drivel until the question ‘Who do you think is a potential; superstar’ popped up. Hannah chose Tom and Savanna. Channelle instantly went into a sulk because she wasn’t named. She accused Savanna of leaving dirty knickers about the house, someone of not showering for a week, Hannah for having bad breath, every insult a coarse minded ten year old could think of.
She then went on to mock Hannah’s pride in being Miss Nigeria UK and how she goes on about it. The pair ended up bandying ‘bitch’ about at one another.

Hannah told Raph she was not happy with Channelle and promptly took to her bed in despair.

Meanwhile, in the DR, Channelle was complaining about Hannah who is not a superstar like her – not a good dancer or singer like she is. She serenaded BB to prove it. Caterwauling is the word.

Raph, mindful of the fact that his group can only survive if it sticks together, tried to broker a peace. Channelle maintained that she was only having some banter. She refused to listen to him and stood there in the bath rejecting his efforts,

Hannah was equally unreceptive to peace and harmony. Her one achievement in life - as she is a humble person -was winning the title of Miss Nigeria UK and she will not have it mocked. No one is to diss her accomplishments.

Deborah went to Channelle but all she got for her trouble was a diatribe about the position Hannah had put her in and how she was afraid of being seen as a racist now.

This row sprang from nowhere and was entirely manufactured by Channelle.
Kieran’s dry comment was that you should be careful who you banter with.

In the end, it was Savanna who was evicted.

Her interview was appalling –Emma’s fault, not hers. Emma brought it to the level of playground squabbles and talked over Savnn, putting words in her mouth/

BB had another surprise for viewers – four more HMs. Sam, who was on BB blnd date, and Andrew, Hurricane Sue, and Simone who were the HMs rejected att the outset of the series.

They are immune fro the next round of nominations but can nominate. They cannot win the title or the prize but £15,000 has been deducted from the prize fund and the one who stays the longest in the house will win that.

Utter tripe and pointless.


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Fri Jun 30, 2017 11:10 pm 
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The Dormouse In The Teapot

Pre-eviction

Channelle was in fine form describing her bodily functions after having a curry. She also treated us to a view and a running commentary about shaving her private parts.
BB may have scraped the bttom of the barrel for HMs but |God alone knows where they went to find her.

In the DR, Ellie told how she dreamed she had been evicted and Prince Harry was there.
What a bloke!

Hannah and Channelle made up while they made burgers for lunch. I t was making ketchup from scratch which threw them into one another’s arms again. Frankly, I wouldn’t eat anything Cannelle had handled.

Channelle gave Isabell a sex education lesson, complete with deomonstration. I doubt Isabelle needs any lessons there. Or maybe she dioes – she did catch an STD from Kieran after all.

In the DR,Channelle wore a very revealing dress for eviction tonight. She ointed out that it was revealing as if BB hadn’t noticed. She also tought her new hairstyle made her look classy.
Never, Channelle, not in a million years.

After the eviction, the Second Chance HMs entered. much to everyone’s displeasure which was carefully concealed by welcoming smiles and leaping up and down with excitement.

Most of the evening was spent in little bits of chit chat the upshot of which was that :
Joe is furious about the £15,000 deducted from the prize money.
Raph was shocked at his reaction – he should just be grateful to be on BB but he;s only after the money.
Hmmm…

Hannah and Channelle, alarmed by Sue’s steady evauation of them,l have decided they must stick together in the face of the invaders
Raph wants all his group to stick together
Sue and Simone have decided to stick together
Kieran is resentful and suspicious of the newcomers but doesn’t have anyone to stick to. He ought to try Raph who was kind enough to explain that there was no real danger to be faced from the new HMs past the first week – their focus would be on getting rid of one another to win the £15,000. Kieran still didn’t get it.

Charlotte only wished to talk of vaginas with Big Sam. She was the most animated I‘ve seen her so far.

Sam was determined to make his mark as an alpha male, drinking two bottles of booze one after the other and belching.

Tom tried to keep up with |Sam and passed out in the DR. Security was sent in to make him drink water and then go to bed. He reminds me of the dormouse in the teapot at the Mad Hatter’s Tea Party.

One little morsel from today’s papers – Simone was kicked off Britain’s Got Talent when she got done for affray after giving a middle aged woman a kicking. Channelle better watch out.


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Sat Jul 01, 2017 10:35 pm 
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Into The Void

This was the first day for the Second Chancers and they were thrown right into the void which is hellishly complicated and rather pointless and has those ghastly personality quizzes before you can get in – but I’ll do my best.

HMs (aapart from the new ones) will undertake a series of tasks. The winner of each one will gain the right to nominate and may also take the HM of their choice plus one 2nd chancer into the void where they may talk nominations freely and glean knowledge of how they are perceived on the outside.
There were a ew puzzled faces among the Hs. Can’t say as I blame them.


DR Raph – he says he’s very excited about it all and that rising levels of paranoia will be interesting to watch.
And that’s what Raph is – an uninvolved watcher!

Sue is an operator – she took it upon herself to warn Ellie about attentions from Sam. Ellie nodded gravely
Of course attention from Sam is just what se wants. She’s a reality TV star – romance and sexual encounters win these shows.
Sue also approached Hannah to quiz her about house alliances – but Hannah managed to dodge the question.

The Void game began with a series of questions set by viewers – who is the most annoying, loyal, game playing etc etc
Hannah won and chose to take her sister and Andrew into the void. They questioned Andrew about how Joe was seen and who he recommended for nomination. He chose
Tom after much shilly shallying – he’s too nervous for this. It all seemed very pointless.

The next game was a silly find-the-ball in the paddling pool game This time Deborah won and chose to take Hannah with her, and Sue, who the girls already knew had sussed them all out.
Is it fair that they get two turns at the void?

Sue advised them that Channelle looks after Channelle and no one else. She advised they nominate Tom too

So, Hannah and Deborah can now nominate.

In the bedroom, Raph sat with his head in his hands until someone (Isabelle) came and asked him if he was Ok. Then he wept (very unconvincingly) because of the cruel things said about his friends during the personality quiz.
I can’t think why – we’ve had those questions more than once.

Kieran has decided, after living with the girls for a month, that women are in fact people. He has learned how they think and what their concerns are.

Andrew, chatting to Ralph, has said that he is all about being a person before he is gay.

Just when I was congratulating BB on avoiding showmances this year, Ellie and Sam have collided which was predictable. He mentioned an attraction and she warned him not to use her, like Lotan (dear girl, Lotan avoided you all that he could). He was outraged at the very idea. Then they hugged, Then they went behind the kitchen units and kissed. Then he swore her to secrecy.
It’s going to be painful this showmance as Ellie does her usual agonising and Sam wants to get to the point.
But never fear – Channelle was watching them like a hawk, tight lipped and glaring. Al is lost if Ellie takes centre stage.

To Isabelle, Ellie admitted that she was drawn to Sam although she didn’t mean to be. Why, only last week she was mad about Lotan.

More interestingly, Andrew admitted in the DR that he f=had fallen for Raph who he finds intriguing. In the bedroom, he announced that he loved Raph which drove Channelle to a frenzy of swearing.
Two showmances – she’ll be edited out of the show as being irrelevant.

Charlotte took Ellie aside and warned her against Sam which gave Ellie another opportunity to agonise about whether she was being used or not.

In Rose Cottage, Simone lay on her bed in the dark, munching crisps and swilling beer and belching.
Whay a shower they are!


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Sun Jul 02, 2017 10:06 pm 
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Oh, Dear, Oh Dear

[img]Oh, Dear, Oh Dear


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As expected, Ellie’s kiss with Sam dominated the entire show tonight which was tedious in the extreme. BB’s ratings are plunging so now we have a situation wh never has so much twaddle been watched by so few. Between the Kiss and earnest discussions about the Vod, it was a threadbare show tonight.

In the DR, Sam laimed the kiss just happened as if he and Ellie were compelled by a mysterious force.
Oh, well, that’s what happens when you duck down behind the kitchen units. Later on Ellie said that the nose of the fridge was romantic. So that that then – ‘twas the fridge that done it.

Charlotte demanded a graphic description of the Kiss. Ellie blged but claimed she and Sam were just friends.
(They only met the ight before).

BB was up to old tricks with the Void task – a quiz where quotations from HMs about other HMs were read out and the correct attribution made. Designed to stir up trouble, of course, which it did in a minor was as it was subsumed by the drama of the slurping kisses beside the fridge.

The reactions of HMs to the Kiss were startling. It was supposed to be a secret but but Ellie blabbed. Naturally. All the HMs were shocked rigid, especially Channelle who actually wept because er friend Ellie had disregarded her advice to be cautious abut Sam. Male Hms came over all protective over naive little Ellie, Joe even going so far as to describe her as fragile! About as fragile as a boulder careering down a mountain. Sam was doomed the moment he stepped into the house. Although he was more than willing because of course showmances get air time. Poor Channelle – we hardly saw or heard her all evening. And Ellie could barely hide her triumph.
The amazing thing was that everyone treated this great love story as if it were real – with the exception of Sue who made light of it.

In the DR, Ellie wept because of the reaction of the others in the house. She was only having fun, after all.

She and Sam sloped off for a chat and soon commenced slurping.
Oh, I don’t know how ‘m going to stand it as she milks love story for all its worth.


As expected, Ellie’s kiss with Sam dominated the entire show tonight which was tedious in the extreme. BB’s ratings are plunging so now we have a situation wh never has so much twaddle been watched by so few. Between the Kiss and earnest discussions about the Vod, it was a threadbare show tonight.

In the DR, Sam laimed the kiss just happened as if he and Ellie were compelled by a mysterious force.
Oh, well, that’s what happens when you duck down behind the kitchen units. Later on Ellie said that the nose of the fridge was romantic. So that that then – ‘twas the fridge that done it.

Charlotte demanded a graphic description of the Kiss. Ellie blged but claimed she and Sam were just friends.
(They only met the ight before).

BB was up to old tricks with the Void task – a quiz where quotations from HMs about other HMs were read out and the correct attribution made. Designed to stir up trouble, of course, which it did in a minor was as it was subsumed by the drama of the slurping kisses beside the fridge.

The reactions of HMs to the Kiss were startling. It was supposed to be a secret but but Ellie blabbed. Naturally. All the HMs were shocked rigid, especially Channelle who actually wept because er friend Ellie had disregarded her advice to be cautious abut Sam. Male Hms came over all protective over naive little Ellie, Joe even going so far as to describe her as fragile! About as fragile as a boulder careering down a mountain. Sam was doomed the moment he stepped into the house. Although he was more than willing because of course showmances get air time. Poor Channelle – we hardly saw or heard her all evening. And Ellie could barely hide her triumph.
The amazing thing was that everyone treated this great love story as if it were real – with the exception of Sue who made light of it.

In the DR, Ellie wept because of the reaction of the others in the house. She was only having fun, after all.

She and Sam sloped off for a chat and soon commenced slurping.
Oh, I don’t know how ‘m going to stand it as she milks love story for all its worth.


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Mon Jul 03, 2017 11:33 pm 
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Nominations Night

Isabelle started he day with a dilemma – she struggled to insert her buttock pads in her bikini bottoms, but apart from a slight left to right, right to left movement when she walked, she managed it successfully. It was a pity, then, that when she was sunbathing they appeared to deflate.

In the DR, Ellie spoke of Sam and the Kiss. What else?

Raph spoke of how unable to accept disagreement Joe was and also about how nice he was being to the second chance HMs – of course they have all the power in the nominations this week.
Ellie and Sam indulged in a little love talk – how much they drank last night and how much they’ll drink tonight. There nothing like q marriage of true minds.

In the garden, the girls lay and discussed pubic hair. Again. I won’t go into it much except to say that Little Tom was all agog and eager to share his own stories of waxing.

Raph told Andrew that his real name was Rafael because he was born in Paris.
(Isn’t it a Spanish name?)

Still in the garden, the girls talked of facials, which unexpectedly turned to talko of oral sex and semen. All thr while the harsh tarty laugh of Ellie rang out across the lawn.

The men were embarrassed, Joe was disgusted and showed it. ‘It’s natural,’ she guffawed.
He shook his head.’No’
She should take care. In the DR she said it was nice that the boys were protective of her innocent naivety. They could change their minds.

Nominations took place then. As usual they caused conflict because BB played them back to the house. Joe was plunged into despair and rage by his. He had several noms but only seemed to mind Raph’s. ‘He’s too clever,’ he snarled.’He knows everything.’ Later on he was on the verge of leaving, and only persuaded to stay by Channelle. He felt he should leave to give Tom a chance of winning, but she talked him out of it.
Oh, the altruism!

In the end, Tom, Joe and Charlotte were nominated. All Lotan’s old team, by the way. Charlotte was upset by her nomination from Hanna, Deb had to explain her nominations of Tom and Joe to Kieran, Hannah had to explain her nomination of Tom to Tom…what happened to the good old days when you nominated and that was that.
Ellie and Raph were the only exceptions – they exchanged confessions of their tactical weaknesses.

Simone sang all by herself in the garden – she’s got a real pub vibrato.

Channelle, partnerless, decided on some sex talk anyway. She used to work on a sex line, she say, and got paid to verbally abuse men. She got £300 from one man when she ddemanded money for drink.

Sam told Ellie that he feels not quite good enough, as if he were tring to take Lotan’s place.
‘Numpty,’ she said and snuggled clse.

In the bedroom, dirty talk broke out again – well, it’s never far away when these girls are about. They were discussing masturbation and Charlotte was insistent that Deborah and Hannah should try it. But Deborah outgunned Charlotte by showing her her genital piercings. They all, including Kieran, crowded round for a look.

If I was mother to any of these girls…


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Tue Jul 04, 2017 11:58 pm 
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Smurf Alert


HMs overslept this morning so BB arranged a very rude awakening involving klaxins and fire alarms. It was god to see them suffer. They are a most unlikeable crew.

In the DR, early bird Deborah complained about Sam and Ellie drinking one another’s saliva. She doesn’t understand the passion after only 2 days.

I think I shall summarise the Great Love Affair and its agonies and get it over with:

- Sue warned Sam against hurting poor little Ellie.
- Ellie and Sam were dyed blue and green respectively. Sam was wearing a remarkable thong ‘
-In the DR, Sam said he and Ellie were just having fun. Nothing too deep.
- Ellie told Simone that things with Sam were getting serious. Simone advised telling him that she just wanted to be friends..
-Sam was asked in a game was he ready for a relationship. He said no.
-Ellie managed to discuss both her relationship with Sam and the one with Loton.
- Elie asked Kieran’s advice about Sam. In so many words, he advised against.
- Sam got a chance to talk to Ellie and was met by jealousy over Isabelle. Also told Ellie just wanted to be friends. He’s heartbroken as he genuinely likes Ellie.They agonise for some time.

Utter twaddle as you can see.

To get back to the others.
Hannah was doing her best to turn the others against Simone whom she considers a game player. This from a lady who suffered a panic attack when she saw Ellie painted bie like a smurf. She has a phobia of smurfs.
Sure. But it was a creative way of taking airtime away from Ellie so I forgive her.

Joe snarled about Raph and how much he dislikes him.. He has a foul vocabularly.

The Shopping Task was called Survival. Hms will be called upon to face hir fears and home truths. Ellie and Sam were sprayed blue and green by BB.

In the living room, a discussion about who would take the moneyand un if given the chance.
Simone said she would because she has children and is short of cash.
Channelle preened and said money was no problem for her and bragged about her trust funds for the children.
Did she make that much from insulting men on the chat line?

BB got tough. Finally. Housemates were punished collectively for an assortment of rule breaks. They lost their electrical appliances,, hot water and spray tan.

Andrew, Charlotte, Deborah and Tom had to go to the survival room where strange insects and reptiles were displayed in cages. The lights went out and things dropped on their head from the roof – pandemonium followed as they shrieked and screamed and frantically brushed at their clothes.
Even when they were let out, normally cool, calm, and collected Deborah kept screaming. She was hilarious.

Channelle, Joe, Izzy and Hannah had to face the BOTS panel for some home truths. the prize money. Deborah said she would take it as she had children.. Joe told her well done. Raph said that that didn’t mean she was only there for the money. Joe began cursing him for butting in on his conversations. Andrew came to his defence and was roundly cursed too.

In the DR, Joe complained about Raph’s intervening in his convesations. Between clenched teeth he hissed expletives and loathing.

Meanwhile, Raph and Andrew agreed that Joe was being unfair. Andrew is pretty keen on expletives too.


Out in the garden, Joe told Andrew not to comment on things that weren’t his business.
Andrew accused Joe of being very abrupt which which Joe clearly didn’t understand, so Andrew kept repeating the word, goading him.

Joe became angrier but was turning to leave when Andrew called him his darling boy in a very camp way. Joe turned back and other HMs had to hold him back.

When he had gone, Andrew rallied the troops to his side, bragging about sorting Joe. I hadn’t realised how afraid of Joe they are until they started treating Andrew lke a hero.


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Wed Jul 05, 2017 11:40 pm 
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Rejection

Cold showers this morning – I can’t think of any group of HMs who deserve them more. Although they didn’t do much to cool Channelle’s ardour.

In the DR, Andrew was defiant about Joe. He is clearly not afraid.
Downstairs, Raph tried to smoke a peace pipe with Joe. He offered his hand, Joe took it, and then proffered a lecture and took his bible oath that he had never said a bad word about Raph.
Liar, liar, pnnts on fire!
In the DR later, Ellie spoke about guess what? Sam, Sam,Sam…

Andrew explained to Sam why Elie might have gone off him – rumours and backbiting circulating round the house.
He’s right too. Also stirring it.

Simone and Channelle were sent to the survival room for their ordeal – Channelle swore like a trooper at the thought of a personal trainer and a work out, but the trainer turned out to be gorgeous so she leapt on him. All through the workout, she caused disruption, grabbed at the trainer, pleaded for mercy, and flirted.
She really is very good at keeping attention on herself.

Sam roamed the house like the ghost of Christmas Past – without Ellie he has nowhere to alight. He feels excluded because no one listens to him or just walks away when he talks.

Another plan to stir up conflict was quite successful. Raph, Simone, Ellie and Kieran were sent into the survival room to be roasted by a BB comedian and impressionist who promptly, in the guise of impersoanating them, relayed things that all the HMs have said about one another. We heard what Ellie said to BB, what Kieran said to Joe about Sam’s showmance but best of all, we heard Joe threatening Rap with revenge, eye for an eye and all that.

Hannah, who heard how Ellie had said that she wouldn’t be missed if she left the huse, was cut to the quick and wondered why she was always a target. Later she approached Ellie about this as she was unaware that she had offended Elie. Ellie dismissed the scapegoat thing and ened up saying she had been influenced by outside forces.

A whole swathe of HMs was invited to diner in the survival room. They had to stay in their chairs and eat their dinner while being shocked. There was much screaming but the highlight was definitely Hannah’s facial expression. Hilarious. Sue made a fair attempt at an analysis of Kieran, Tom and Joe while they showed off by doing headstands to impress one another while leaving Sam, Andrew and Kieran out. It’s pack mentality, she said. Later on she mused that Kieran was playing a very low key game, coming across as Mr Nice Guy. Raph agreed that he seemed like the sort who would take an old ady across the road.

Ellie, unable to give up on her little drama, spoke to Tom about Sam A stuttering inarticulate Tom managed to assure her that he had her back.

In the DR, a crestfallen Sam told BB how excluded he was by the hostile inner clique. They put words in Ellie’s mouth. Theywere nice to is face but talked behind his back.

Sam talked to Tom about it. Ellie had been crying and wouldn’t tell him why.
Manfully, little Tom said he wouldn’t let Ellie be hurt. If Sam had a problem he should take to people face to face (Duh! That’s what he was doing.) but unable to deal with the concept of exclusion and backbiting where Joe and his two acolytes ringed Sam while Joe pontificated about about dealing with people face to face and demanding to know if Sam believed they were talking behind his back. Several times. Loudly. Laying down the law while his stooges silently backed him up/, Tom went and fetched Joe and Kieran to deal with Sam. It was an ugly little scene. Poor Sam was quite crushed.

I the kitchen, Simone twerked for Hannah and Deborah. She has no place in the house really so I suppose it was a last resort to draw attention.

Andrew, who is also minus a drama, asked Raph for a hug and then wouldn’t let go in spite of protests from Raph. Andrew tried to kiss him in spite of pleas to stop because he didn’t like being touched from Raph. In the struggle, Raph fell to the floor, only to be grabbed by Hannah when he got up.
He actually did look very uncomfortable.

Channelle got told to F off by Joe when she laughed at something Ellie had said. Her instant response was to quiz him abut his sexual practices in very explicit terms.
He gave her such a look of contempt that I’m surprised she didn’t sink throughthe floot. But of course, filthy talk is her stock in trade. She isn’t easily embarrassed.

At the end of the evening, Andrew said that he never meant to make him feel so uncomfortable. Raph ended up half apologising to Andrew for having a poor response to him. He even gave him a hug to show all was forgiven.


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 12:29 am 
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Everyone Is Being Themselves

Bad news first: Sue has a big mouth and we heard a lot of it tonight. The showmance is back on, God help us all.

Sue kicked off the evening by complaining loudly about dirty. Lazy, pathetic houesemates. Chanelle wasn’t present and so Sue took her aside to tell her in person what she might otherwise have heard from the others. She said she was upset by the general lack of consideration the HMs show. Channelle was transfixed and clearly very uneasy. Sue is a powerful woman. Channelle eventually conceded that she was a bit of a diva but started on a she’s had a hard life… Sue promptly shut her down with a remark about typical Mancunians. Channelle was unsure whether this was a compliment or not and remained uneasy about their little chat.

In the garden afterwards, Channelle recounted what was said but in a very low voice, so unlike her usual. She’s been firmly put in a place.


Andrew, Sue and Deborah were sent to the survival room where they had to lie behind a board with holes cut into to reveal their feet. They were to have their feet licked by three surprise they couldn’t see because of the board.

The first licker was a beautiful husky dog which happily went from foot to foot licking whatever they were anointed with. Giggle all round from behind the board. Te next assault of their feet was from two beautiful little ferrets. The HMs, unable to guess what they were shrieked and howled and actually panicked. It was so funny hearing them but only seeing their bare feet sticking out of the board. The third licker was a big burly shaven headed guy who made a meal of their tootsies. He had them howling as well – Deb was hysterical. They all screamed again when the big man rose above the level of the board to say goodbye.
I think I would have as well.

Earlier, there were some little fragments: Tom practising his poolside pickup lines ( we didn’t get to hear them). And Joe getting into drag and twerking in the garden.
I could have done without that.
And of course, a visit to the DR by Sam, lamenting Ellie and reassuring the public that he had no bad intentions there.

In the smoking area, Sue told Kieran he was a very nice person even if some might call him dull and a fence sitter. Kieran was as transfixed as Channelle had been – Sue has the voice of authority. She pronounced him the winner of the show. He thanked her profusely but modestly claimed that could never be.

Why did he claim that? Because HMs immediately started discussing him and his Mr. Nice Guy Act. Sue has marked him for death!

Still pontificating in the garden, Sue maintained that Channelle’s spirit and hers touched on the very first night in the house.

Hannah asked Kieran who was the alpha male in the house, implying that he was. Kieran denied it, of course – nothing could guarantee: the burden of being Mr. Nice Guy to the public is heavy enough.

Sue also spoke on the subject of alpha people and maintained that Channelle was alpha because she was a big influence on people. Channelle was outraged because she has weaknesses that she cannot show and so cannot be an alpha person.

Sam and Elie met up for a chat which she didn’t really want (she says) Sam was hurt. There was a bit more about realationships and friendship but they finished up holding hands.

Sue, having exhausted the subject of alphas, moved on to the subject of games. They were all in a game and playing their parts. Little Tom, drunk by this time, took umbrage. He said they were all being themselves and not playacting. Sue disagreed volubly – she was more than a little drunk herself- Tom said, as he often does, that he was in the house for the experience He slurred that it wasn’t a game, it was real, that’s why it was called Reality TV The argument gathered pace, Sue’s voice like a brazen trumpet

He was so distressed – he isn’t bright enough to handle debate – that he splashed everybody at the pool The others consoled him and in the end he went to the DR and slurred to BB how upset he was, that BB was real and not a game.

Downstairs Sam remonstrated with Sue for upsetting the wee guy. Drunk, she bawled mockery of his showmance at him and had to be led away when he bawled back.

In the DR, she claimed to have lfe expeence and common sense and cllaed the HMs pathetic.

Kieran spoke to Tom about not letting Sue wind him up. Joe joined in with the same advice – they’re terrified he goes on Friday. But the lirttle man was too distraught to listen.

Meanwhile, Sam and Ellie were sharing more slurpy kisses’ To show the depth of his affection he pulled his enlarged penis out of his shorts.

Back to Tom, once more in the DR. He is still feeling insulted by Sue’s allegations of gameplaying among his friends. He wants to see |Paris, his GF, to tell her he loves her. Then he wanted to see Ellie, his sister in the house because she understands him.
When he mentioned seeing Paris, she thought he meant going to Paris with her. A bewildered Tom staggered off to the exit and kicked the door open.
She immediately went downstairs and told everyone about the conversation Some sister.

Security brought Tom back to the DR and BB said he would speak to Tom in the morning and gently told him to go to bed.

Tom is an interesting character. Thick as two short planks. Loyal. The originator of some very many comic moments and misunderstandings.
Is he really really real?

The Mad Hatter and The March Hare put the dormouse in the teapot

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