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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Mon Jan 18, 2016 3:40 pm 
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Marion Arnott wrote:
Shut Up, Just Shut Up, Stephanie!

Angie ... would not speak to BB except to say ‘Passport. Phone. Car back into town’ several times. In the end, of course, she stayed. Drama over nothing.

[...]

David spent another day in bed in the spare room. Sometimes I think he really will be found dead in there and everyone will laugh because they’ll think it’s a mistake like last time.

[...]

In the DR, Stephanie used the filthiest language, the kind that in the good old days BB bleeped out, and then started AGAIN on he subject of her BF and how she’ll never forgive herself for what she’s done. Then she switched back to Gemma and her lack of real celebrity and said she couldn’t go back in the house or she’d punch her in the face.
H, for the good old days when threats of violence got you evicted!
But she carried on shouting and cursing and was eventually put in a spare room (a sort of padded room) where she stood in the middle of the floor swearing in the dark and demanding to leave. Apparently she won’t risk her relationship by staying in. She was last seen gushing obscenities at the very thought of Gemma, alone in her padded darkened room.

Back in the house, the HMs had been asleep for a couple of hours when they were wakened by a terrified Gemma who claimed to have seen a ghost. She doesn’t know that she has more to fear from Stephanie than a lost revenant.


Some amazing, annoying and amusing scenes brilliantly described by Marion as ever.
The latter ones with Stephanie in the large dark room pacing up and down as if in Shakespearean tragedy coupled with a performance of the Marat Sade, AND the later scene with the scary ghost in the wall, were TRULY haunting. Can only happen on BB!
BTW I forgot to mention earlier that Stepahnie's talent show singing in a sort of clown outfit was very good and I now sense she has the sense of the darkly dramatic as well as of the quirky circus razzmatazz.

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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Mon Jan 18, 2016 5:37 pm 
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des2 wrote:
Marion Arnott wrote:
Shut Up, Just Shut Up, Stephanie!

Angie ... would not speak to BB except to say ‘Passport. Phone. Car back into town’ several times. In the end, of course, she stayed. Drama over nothing.

[...]

David spent another day in bed in the spare room. Sometimes I think he really will be found dead in there and everyone will laugh because they’ll think it’s a mistake like last time.

[...]

In the DR, Stephanie used the filthiest language, the kind that in the good old days BB bleeped out, and then started AGAIN on he subject of her BF and how she’ll never forgive herself for what she’s done. Then she switched back to Gemma and her lack of real celebrity and said she couldn’t go back in the house or she’d punch her in the face.
H, for the good old days when threats of violence got you evicted!
But she carried on shouting and cursing and was eventually put in a spare room (a sort of padded room) where she stood in the middle of the floor swearing in the dark and demanding to leave. Apparently she won’t risk her relationship by staying in. She was last seen gushing obscenities at the very thought of Gemma, alone in her padded darkened room.

Back in the house, the HMs had been asleep for a couple of hours when they were wakened by a terrified Gemma who claimed to have seen a ghost. She doesn’t know that she has more to fear from Stephanie than a lost revenant.


Some amazing, annoying and amusing scenes brilliantly described by Marion as ever.
The latter ones with Stephanie in the large dark room pacing up and down as if in Shakespearean tragedy coupled with a performance of the Marat Sade, AND the later scene with the scary ghost in the wall, were TRULY haunting. Can only happen on BB!
BTW I forgot to mention earlier that Stepahnie's talent show singing in a sort of clown outfit was very good and I now sense she has the sense of the darkly dramatic as well as of the quirky circus razzmatazz.



That scene in the darkened room was indeed haunting.
David gest has left the house, alive I hope.

Couldn't see the blue rhino last night, or any other animals come to that. But I didthink Tiffany in her clingy black evening dress resembled Jessica Rabbit.

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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Mon Jan 18, 2016 9:11 pm 
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Ps: I missed quoting another brilliant summation by Marion - one about gulags...

"Stephanie, always determined to have the last word, hauled poor Jeremy out of bed for more discussion. She kept talking about her BF whose voice she can’t even remember any more – anyone would think that she had been consigned to the gulags for twenty years. However, her agony moved Jeremy and they went backto bed together and commenced kissing."

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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Mon Jan 18, 2016 11:17 pm 
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Pathetic Capitalist Whores

Everyone was out of sorts this morning, especially John. He did not appreciate a sleepless night after selfish Gemma-the –monster’s ghost made its appearance.

Interestingly, Tiffany appeared to believe in the ghost which she senses goes from bed to bed in the night, getting stronger with every person that leaves. Useless to say the ghost was actually a BB employee in the camera run – Gemma and Tiffany know the truth!

In the DR, Scotty was also unhappy with Gemma’s carry on. And worried about Jeremy and the impact of Stephanie.

Oh, pack it in.

David also was concerned about Jeremy and tells him so – in his gentle way, he laid it on the line that Stephanie is with someone etc etc

If I didn’t quite like David I’d tell him to pack it in as well.

In the DR, the lady (speaking figuratively) in question was sulky and sullen and telling BB she was sorry after getting a warning about her behaviour and threatening language.

Did we believe that story? Nope.

John had a little melt down in the house. Hand to brow a la Sara Bernhardt, he said he was tried, drained, exhausted. And angry. He wept. He can’t cope. He sobbed painfully. He had to be comforted by a brace of females.
Big girl’s blouse!

In the DR David said he was so tired. (He looked it too. That man isn’t well.) He found that the house was changed – everyone down and at war. He also spoke of Jeremy and Stephanie. I’ll pass over that.

Stephanie received a warm welcome when she re-entered the house. She informed the HMs that she was going to confront Gemma – so much for being sorry.

An unsuspecting Gemma woke up at last and sallied forth to the kitchen. Stephanie hailed her like a taxi and laid into her, telling her that she couldn’t put HER down. Called her a fool and said she was like Simba the Lion King with her friggin’ hair.
Gemma remained remarkably composed and asked her to be quiet as it was first thing in the morning. On and on she went, gabbling infantile insults, mimicking Gemma, calling her a bully picking on a 22 years old girl.
She got so wound up that her supporters became alarmed and finally Jeremy dragged her away.
Gemma was relatively unperturbed. She must know that the nation now has seen Stephanie’s little ratty face contorted with juvenile spite and heard that fork-on-a-plate voice.

Tiffany told Gemma that Stephanie had an action doll behind her. Poor Jeremy! Mega thinks John’s a wimp. The men aren’t showing very well here.

In the DR,, Jeremy claimed to be drained. No sleep. He squeezed out some tears because he’s angry at life. He wept that Gemma would love to see him like this.

I expect she would laugh her head off, John. I certainly did.

Tiffany was given a secret mission: to go round the HMs and spread rumours. The faces of the HMs being told secrets were priceless, they really were, all agog to hear the dirt being dished. She convinced the HMs that rumours were true and won herself a luxury pamper session with a beautician. She chose Angie to share the prize with and the two sat contentedly having their nails painted and their feet massaged. Nice little scene.

In the DR, Gemma decided to break down a little. I say chose because she was as fake as John was. She didn’t like Stephanie’s personal comments. A tear or two. But she remained composed enough to remember to point out to viewers that she had only said to Stephanie’s face what others were saying behind her back. True.

Upon leaving the DR, she approached Darren to tell him that she was disappointed that he had offered her no comfort after the Stephanie scene.’ Made you a cup of tea,’ he pointed out and then fell to apologising and expressing his eternal gratitude for how she had stood up for him on nominations night.
Poor Darren. Shell shocked by Big Bertha.

Satisfied, Gemma swept into the garden to settle Stephanie’s hash. Stephanie said she was sorry for what she said to Gemma in between saying why she had been so angry with Gemma. She was soon off again, rabbiting on about everything. Again, Gemma didn’t lose her cool. She accepted the apology but repeated several times that all the other HMs were saying the same as she had only behind Stephanie’s back. Stephanie didn’t appear to register this but it will come back to haunt her – was Gemma being truthful there? Are the others really talking about her?
Masterful, Gemma, masterful.

David has finally left the house due to illness. That’s a pity because he seemed like a nice man.

BB gave the HMs a party. Angie was trying to sleep but couldn’t because the light was kept on and the noise was atrocious.

A lot of the noise emanated from Tiffany and Jeremy screeching with laughter as she rode round the garden on his back. She made a definite pay for him, telling him that she hadn’t done so sooner out of respect for Stephanie. Angie exploded out of bed and started packing. In the DR, she demanded to be let out of the house; she went upstairs and kicked and banged on the outside door; back in the DR, she demanded her belongings and a car to take her back to London. BB seemed rather shaken and ffered to put the lights out in the bedroom for her. He reminded her it was 3 in the morning – well, that’s what she’s complaining about, isn’t it? If they didn’t have a car, the pathetic capitalist whores could summon an Uber taxi for her.
That’s how bad she felt – she ‘d go by Uber.
Oh dear!


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Tue Jan 19, 2016 9:54 am 
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I think hyper-outbursts are now expected by audience and CBB itself.
They used to be special, noteworthy.
Now they are two a penny.

By the way, why is the ex-wife of - and shared parent with - a recently deceased universal icon still playing around like this 'in camera'?

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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Tue Jan 19, 2016 1:09 pm 
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des2 wrote:
I think hyper-outbursts are now expected by audience and CBB itself.
They used to be special, noteworthy.
Now they are two a penny.

By the way, why is the ex-wife of - and shared parent with - a recently deceased universal icon still playing around like this 'in camera'?


Yes, it's reality TV's style. People with limited imagination and limited intelligence fall back on being 'controversisal' which means using the 'C' word lots and lots, screaming juvenile insults and sobbing inconsolably. This is what they call drama. The tedium of it is crushing.
As for Angie, I can only assume that she needs the money. Having peeped at her website and seen samples from her poetry collections, I can see that she can't make money any other way.


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Tue Jan 19, 2016 10:53 pm 
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Abandon Ship!

Oh, dear! David has gone because of his health, Angie has gone because of her health (she says but if there’s anything wrong anywhere it’s with her spleen), and Kristina has been evicted (she said more in a ten minute interview with Emma than she has done during the entire show).

The show started with Gemma, in those faux outrage tones she reserves for those she wants to crush, telling Danniella about Angie shouting and swearing about the noise at night.

Meanwhile, John was relating to the others how Gemma encouraged Angie to leave by telling her to batter down the fire exit. Gemma has ruined his whole BB experience, he said, and Chris’s also, who has become Gemma’s bitch. Chris said with determined feebleness that he isn’t any more. Well, he did talk back to her a little yesterday. I suspect he’ll pay for that and soon be running with her cups of tea again.

BB announced that Angie was unwell but would soon be returning to the house. Gemma was not pleased: Angie causes trouble and will only repeat the ‘I’m leaving’ tactic. For good measure, she accused John of being two faced, which he undoubtedly is. The trouble is, he has moderated his behaviour since he heard the crowd booing him and Gemma is emerging as a stirrer and a tyrant.

Chris-who-is-not-Gemma’s bitch was soon locked in the toilet with her, performing some unmentionable service. Snippets of conversation sounded vaguely lewd but in the end he appears to have been applying fake tan. He and Darren shared a schoolboy laugh at seeing Gemma’s designer vagina. They shared several jokes at Gemma’s expense, in fact. It’s the first time I’ve seen them laughing genuinely.

Tonight’s task was for Kristina. She had to teach HM couples to dance the dango in readiness for a competition. Jeremy appeared the ultimate macho tango- er in his tattoos and a waistcoat with no shirt underneath. He and Stephanie won the competition because of her high kicks but not before Gemma and Christopher dad fallen to the floor under Gemma’s weight. She lay waving her arms and legs like a turtle flipped on ts back. Oh, dear.

Gemma soon returned to the subject of Angie who, according to er, gives nothing to the house and should leave. (she’s light on her feet, Gemma, give her that much).

Angie duly reappeared, suffering her 103 temperature with dignity. But it soon transpired that she was leaving anyway with her new hairdo and her floaty scarves and such. I hope they got her better than an Uber taxi.

In the DR, John practised a little reversed psychology – Gemma would love it if he got evicted, he said, and if he didn’t she’d go round saying he didn’t deserve to stay.

Danniella thinks Scotty and Megan make a lovely couple. She thinks Megan is a fine role model and wants her daughter to grow up just like her.
Is she serious?

In the DR, Tiffany declared her love for Darren. Yesterday it was Jeremy she wanted some of but he’s too loyal to Stephanie. She can imagine herself as Tiffany Day. Of course, now that Stephanie is ill with a sore throat, she might have a chance with Jeremy.

Make up your mind, girl, or people will think you’re desperate.

Gemma confided in Tiffany, and the nation, that she wished she had someone to look after her, especially financially – putting petrol in the car and so on. All she does is work like a dog and in her line faces an uncertain future. I think she was trying to show us a vulnerable side.
Tiffany says it will happen.
And so it might if he doesn’t expect her to trip the light fantastic.


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Wed Jan 20, 2016 8:30 am 
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Marion Arnott wrote:
Abandon Ship!


Indeed, the amortisation by the classic BB tontine model works strongly...
By self-ejection and ejection by others.

Quote:
Danniella thinks Scotty and Megan make a lovely couple. She thinks Megan is a fine role model and wants her daughter to grow up just like her.
Is she serious?


I wondered that! Did she see Megan in the diary room on the night security officers were called in?

I note that votes these days are always to 'save'. I suspect Kristina (who?) would still be there if the votes were to 'evict'.

And, Marion, thanks (I think) for clarifying what Christopher and Gemma were doing beyond the camera's reach!

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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Wed Jan 20, 2016 2:54 pm 
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des2 wrote:
Marion Arnott wrote:
Abandon Ship!


Indeed, the amortisation by the classic BB tontine model works strongly...
By self-ejection and ejection by others.

Quote:
Danniella thinks Scotty and Megan make a lovely couple. She thinks Megan is a fine role model and wants her daughter to grow up just like her.
Is she serious?



And, Marion, thanks (I think) for clarifying what Christopher and Gemma were doing beyond the camera's reach!


The mind recoils from wondering how he came to see her Designer V. That image is going to haunt me. Probably you too. And the BB viewing public: shudder ,!


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Wed Jan 20, 2016 11:47 pm 
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Not Quite Cricket

Pre last night’s eviction:

Chris is in rebellion – John seems to have put some steel in his spine. At any rate, he has decided not to give Gemma tea in bed any more. He even used the F word. However, Gemma spilled water on the floor and bewailed the lack of cleaners as she swept by it. Chris went and mopped it up. Chris, rebel, rebel you are not.

Angie said her farewells before she left the house. Hms were generally distressed but Gemma, from the depths of her duvet and a long lie merely said ‘Bye’.

In the DR, Stephanie said she was unwell and was allowed to go to bed in the spare room. Must be a strp throat infection going round.

The task tonight was one of those ‘How Well Do You Know The HMs’ things. The first question was ‘Who wears underpants for more than one day?’

Oh, please…

John turned out to be the HM who had regrets about being in the house. John excelled himself with his regret – he didn’t weep at his father’s funeral or at his mother’s long illness but he was made to cry by Gemma’s treatment of him, her bitchiness, her two facedness…really? Interesting set of priorities there.

Later Gemma was all honey and tried to reconcile with him later, but was fiercely rebuffed. She denied that she bore him any ill will – she didn’t care enough about him to harbour such feelings. Ouch! Gemma is at her most poisonous when speaking with honeyed words.
She and John deserve one another.

After Kristina was evicted, the HMs were told that they would nominate right away – face to face. It was a genuinely fraught and emotional scene. The most interesting thing was that BB made no attempt to make the HMs be silent during nominations. Tiffany was extremely loud mouthed about being nominated. She claims she was F***** from the moment she stepped into the house. It was like being in the Twilight Zone, she said, coming from America to the UK. She would not shut up when Megan nominated her and interrupted Stephanie to the extent she couldn’t even give her reasons for nominating or her second nomination.
She may feel she’s in the Twilight Zone, but her behaviour wasn’t quite cricket, was it? Nomination is part of the game. Danniella was genuinely upset by Tiffany’s noisy tantrum, holding her head in her hands in despair.
Chris too was badly affected, tearfully nominating Tiffany, clearly afraid she’d have a tempestuous go at him too. He had to flee the room to be sick when he’d finished his noms. Amazingly, Tiffany was kind to him.
John and Gemma nominated each other, of course, for much the same reasons. Scotty got himself into trouble with Stephanie for nominating her over the Jeremy scenario which caused Stephanie to play up her illness and seek comfort in Jeremy’s arms. He was only too happy to oblige, squeezing her thigh to show the depth of his emotion.

In the DR, Tiffany expressed her displeasure with her fellow HMs, loudly and repetitively. She doesn’t want to live with these people any more. She may get her wish.

Darren had nominated John because of his nomination of Darren the week before. He approached John to explain how he had felt as if he had been stabbed in the heart, that he’s been really hurt by it. John told him that he knew all that as Darren had told him several times that he had been hurt and would probably tell him more times. His barely contained impatience with Darren was in a way crueller than Tiffany’s explosions. This was a most unpleasant rebuff.

Meanwhile, John raided Gemma’s wardrobe and donned her tangerine, crystal beaded caftan. He made much of the breadth of the caftan, holding out the material, I suppose, to emphasise the size. But he ended up looking like an idiot flittinground the house in it.

In the DR, Gemma pondered the strangeness of John’s behaviour at his father’s funeral and his mother’s sickbed.
It struck me too,
She also objected to John’s wearing her clothes.
I think I would too. That’s the thing about Gemma – she’s poisonous but often right when you wished she wasn’t.

The night was not over for Gemma and John. She explained to him that she had two personae – her TOWIE one and another that is just Gemma. Shy. Sensitive. Nice. John decided to try some of his psychoanalysis skills on Gemma but didn’t get very far. She’s too difficult for you John-boy.

I shall go to bed tonight hugging to myelf Gema’s vision of hersef as shy and sensitive.


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Thu Jan 21, 2016 8:26 am 
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The words 'genuinely fraught' also came to my mind about the face-to-face nominations, and I wonder if TV ever sees such 'natural' drama as here on Big Brother.
But, then, I thought - there are often rumours of who is to appear on CBB before it starts, and I wonder if they all know who is going to be with them on the show, thus allowing advance clandestine plans for such 'dramas'?
Jacksy John's reason for evicting Darren a week or so ago seemed so utterly contrived, for example.

Gemma is indeed someone easy to hate, but she seems to have a wiliness that borders on wisdom..

I think I saw a large cat last night with a lightshade as a hat.

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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Thu Jan 21, 2016 11:51 pm 
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Closer To The Sky

The shopping task consisted of a series of random events which the HMs had to go along with That’s OK but we all know that it’s the random events they don’t go along with which make the show.
Stephanie and Darren were excused the task because of ill health although her sore throat didn’t stop her playing pranks while the others performed the task. She hid HMs shoes around the bedroom and caused a massive explosion of rage from Danniella, Gemma, and Megan. Gemma’s very expensive Dolce and Gabbans shoes went missing; Danniella was not pleased to find a dirty trainer print on her pillow, or, as it turned out, Stephanie’s dirty knickers on the floor and her belongings left lying everywhere unless Jeremy picked them up for her. Megan was provoked to another storm of temper by Stephanie slutty habit of borrowing her clothes and leaving them lying. The final straw was to find her brand new tracksuit lying soaking wet in a corner, smelling of chlorine because Jeremy had tossed Stephanie I the pool for squirting toothpaste on his hair when he was asleep.
How can BB plan events as surreal as all that?

He tried, however. The first task was a rousing one on exercise bikes first thing in the morning. HMs threw themselves into it with gusto but Gemma refused to get out of bed for the task and so surely they have lost it before they’ve even begun. She lay across the chair in the DR pretending to cry over the games she cannot stand and whining that she would not join in.

The best of BB’s random events was the task for Tiffany and Chris.
They were presenters of a Wildlife show, educating viewers about beasts in the wild. Imagine their horror when a furry tarantula, all orange and black and the size of a saucer, was put into Chris’s hand! It climbed up his arm and was heading for his face before its keeper took it away. Tiffany was horrified in her turn by having to touch an extremely large Burmese python which kills by strangulation. Shudder. They must have looked longingly at the friendly tiger, giraffes and parrots scattered round their studio.
Like most of BB’s tasks recently, this one was designed to cause trouble. The autocue the pair were reading from had occasional blanks in the text which Chris had to fill in with a HM’s name. Thus it was that he labelled Gemma shallow and untrustworthy. The whole house knew he would pay for that abd sure enough Gemma took him into the toilet to reproach him. But for once he argued back. I guess facing the tarantula has made him man up.

Tiffany and Gemma discussed Chris’s nomination of them in the snug (they like it up there because it’s closer to the sky and away from quarrelsome HMs). Gemma declared herself terrified that a drip off her coffee spoon would have him nominating her again.

I am loath to return to ghastly Stephanie and foolish Jeremy, but it looks as if it’s finally over. Gemma happened to mention how gorgeous Sam, Stephanie’s BF is (funny that) and Stephanie started on about how wonderful he is and how she’s going to marry him-all in front of a devastated Jeremy. In the DR, she claimed that she has only just realised that she misses Sam. Her explanation for that was that she missed him so much, she just blocked him out. But she had never meant to tease Jeremy.

Jeremy and Stephanie squabbled about it and Megan took the opportunity to tell Jeremy that Stephanie had never been sincere and that she would dump him as soon as she got out of the house.

In the DR, Jeremy said that he was over it, bored with it. Why couldn’t Stephanie be honest and real?

This brings us directly to your comments today, Des – how much of this is pre-decided by HMs, those incestuous HMs who all know one another from the reality TV circuit. We’ve discussed this before – I think it’s becoming clear that the show may be broadly planned out by BB himself and adlibbed according to guidelines.

Whatever, Stephanie, contrite and weeping on the floor, eavesdropped on Jeremy’s DR confidences. When she tried to talk to Jeremy when he came out, she was stricken by his coldness as he made his way to smoker’s corner for a ciggie. Not even the lure of one of her famous hugs brought him back to her side. He sat alone on a bench in the rain.
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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Fri Jan 22, 2016 8:53 am 
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Marion Arnott wrote:
This brings us directly to your comments today, Des – how much of this is pre-decided by HMs, those incestuous HMs who all know one another from the reality TV circuit. We’ve discussed this before – I think it’s becoming clear that the show may be broadly planned out by BB himself and adlibbed according to guidelines.


I think this may also apply to the main BB as well as CBB, the two growing closer to each other in type of housemate and ethos over the years.
Having said that, there is still something fixed and fluid, spontaneous and staged, fiction and truth that you can get nowhere else. A phenomenon or 'happening' that evokes preternatural events and references that no one can satisfactorily explain but are as equally meaningful as the more obvious motivations.

There are more exponentially 'mixed-up' souls morphing off each other than ever this January in CBB.

Meanwhile, I enjoyed last night's big game task. But still no sight of the blue rhino.

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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Fri Jan 22, 2016 1:37 pm 
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des2 wrote:
Marion Arnott wrote:
This brings us directly to your comments today, Des – how much of this is pre-decided by HMs, those incestuous HMs who all know one another from the reality TV circuit. We’ve discussed this before – I think it’s becoming clear that the show may be broadly planned out by BB himself and adlibbed according to guidelines.


I think this may also apply to the main BB as well as CBB, the two growing closer to each other in type of housemate and ethos over the years.
Having said that, there is still something fixed and fluid, spontaneous and staged, fiction and truth that you can get nowhere else. A phenomenon or 'happening' that evokes preternatural events and references that no one can satisfactorily explain but are as equally meaningful as the more obvious motivations.

There are more exponentially 'mixed-up' souls morphing off each other than ever this January in CBB.

Meanwhile, I enjoyed last night's big game task. But still no sight of the blue rhino.


I keep a weather eye out for the rhino but it's rare as a unicorn. No signs of a swan either, which is a continual source of disppointment to me. Perhaps the tiger ate it!
Spontaneity can't help but happen. I love it whrn BB gets taken by surprise.
So who is to go tonight? I'm hoping it's that dreary bore Stephanie but mistrust the sudden emphasis on her BF from Gemma and the others. Sounds like a cue for his arrival in the house. If that is so, let's hope that the rhino is lying in wait, ready to trample the pair to a slushy romantic pulp.


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 Post subject: Re: Big Brother
PostPosted: Sat Jan 23, 2016 12:08 am 
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Wildlife

Jeremy was feeling really sorry for himself over Stephanie and her bloody BF (hereafter known as BBF); he even managed to feel sorry for anyone who had to listen to it all. (Thanks, son, but sorry doesn’t count if you don’t do something about it – I speak as one who has suffered). Scotty and Darren were quick to bolster his resolve by counselling against further entanglements with Stephanie.
Things were looked even hopeful when Stephanie and Jeremy sat in the lounge sulking in silence at one another.

As part of the Go Along With It Task, two policemen arrived to escort two HMs to jail, John and Gemma who were voted for by the public. John came quietly enough but Gemma refused to go even if it meant another task failed. The officers were about as much use as a Cologne Cop and Gemma was not dragged kicking and screaming to the cage. Instead, she threw a massive tantrum, screaming that she is claustrophobic, that she doesn’t like games, that she’s leaving. A weary John said she wasn’t going anywhere and how right she was. BB offered HMs the right to bail out one HM in exchange for surrendering beauty products and going without hot water. All the HMs tried to coax her into jail but the lady was not for turning and so they bailed her out to save the task. Personally I’d have bailed out John instead of giving her her own way.

Chris approached Gemma with a question – had she really called him a F****** C***during the wildlife broadcast. She did. Chris was silent but Gemma was not. She sallied forth to take on Stephanie who had informed on her. She ordered Stephanie to drop the matter of jail and said she wouldn’t go even to save the hot water supply. The two bickered and she taunted Stephanie about her cheap clothes and make-up. That was rich coming from a fat lady in sunglasses and the best black see through negligee that Ann Summers can produce for under a tenner. Jeremy eventually took Stephanie away - big mistake because she instantly drew him into talking about herself. He tried to stand his ground but she wept and flattered and gabbled and wept and soon he was under her spell again and taking her into his strong arms.

Scotty ad megan were also up to eviction night tricks – she in her skimpiest underwear doing a good imitation of eating him alive on the bed.

Far more interesting and charming was the next bit of the task. 44 ducks were let loose in the garden and Scotty and Darren had to herd them into a pen. The ducks rushed round the garden in tight formation, quacking loudly, with the two giggling men chasing after them. They were the stars of the evening, along with the two parots, the sad-eyed dog, the tiger and the pair of white doves I spotted. (no blue rhino in view yet, des).

BBF alert! Jeremy and John discussed Stephanie’s BBF coming on to te sow.
No. Just no!

In the DR, Scotty confided his rage at Gemma’s tantrums and also the state of his libido. When he gets to his GF (thought he was single?) she was going to be in a wheelbarrow for a week.
He really should try to acquire some of the ducks’ charm and grace.

A Task where some HMs had to mimic other HMs was rather feeble but they passed it and enough of the other tasks to win their luxury food budget. There was a time they’d all have been on chickpeas for a week if someone had reused to participate in the tasks.

A rather bizarre scene was when Gemma confided in Tiffany that she was certainly pregnant if somewhat confused about who the father was. Then a very short time later she found that she was not pregnant after all. Instead of thinking Mumsy thoughts, she had a go at Stephanie for looking at her. She went on and on and on…

In the end, megan was evicted. One less romance to be bored by; no more of Megan’s thong cutting int her buttocks. There’s always a positive. During her interview with Emma, she was shown the recording of her raving at John and shouting and swearing at BB. She was unrepentant. It was all the fault of the other HMs, so there.

Back in the house, it was announced that all the HMs were up for eviction on Tuesday. But in the Forgotten Theatre, over the whole weekend, they would be given chances to win immunity. The first task was to wind up their music box and eventually a theatrical mask would come out – white for no immunity, gold for immunity.
Gemma won the gold mask. Well, of course she did.


Image

I have just discovered that a flock of ducks is called a badelynge. You learn something every day!


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