pages in this section

Black Static


Getting To Know Steven Pirie

11th May, 2011

Author: Peter Tennant

Web Exclusive icon

Steven Pirie was one of our featured authors in the Case Notes section of Black Static #22, with an interview and an in-depth review of his latest novel Burying Brian. And now, for the second half of the whole Case Notes experience, he gets to answer the very same inane questions I put to Tim Lees last week (I don't get paid enough to come up with anything new), while the rest of us are at liberty to study and compare the responses of these two doyens of speculative literature and reach the conclusions now that critics like John Clute and S. T. Joshi will arrive at in twenty years time.

Steven Pirie, your starter for ten:-

Q: Kylie or Madonna?

A: Kylie. I'm not fond of either's voice, though in general I do like the female voice. But Kylie does have a nice bottom, and in general I do like female bottoms.

Q: Your first book or your latest one?

A: The latest. I have to say that, do I not?

Q: Black Forest Gateau or Lemon Meringue?

A: Black Forest Gateau.

Q: Star Trek: TNG or classic Star Trek?

A: TNG. I look back and laugh at cardboard boulders and wooden acting.

Q: Sport, prefer to play or watch?

A: Watch, as I'm an old bugger and require lengthy hospitalisation after playing.

Q: Watching the Royal Wedding or answering daft questions?

A: Daft questions, daft questions...

Q: Les Miserables or Phantom of the Opera?

A: Les Miserables.

Q: Would rather be published in Interzone or Black Static?

A: Black Static.

Q: Tea or coffee?

A: Coffee. But not too much of it.

Q: Seen the most times - Halloween or Friday the 13th?

A: Once each. I'm not one to 'revisit' movies.

Q: A helicopter ride or a boat trip?

A: Helicopter ride.

Q: Let's be macabre for a moment - cremation or burial?

A: Cremation. When I'm gone I'm gone.

Q: And now let's just be naff - Katie Price or Paris Hilton?

A: Paris Hilton. When I'm gone I'm gone. :-)

Q: Would you prefer to read J. G. Ballard or Christopher Priest?

A: Tough one... Christopher Priest, but don't ask me why.

Q: Fast food options - McDonalds or Pizza Hut?

A: McDonalds. I make static noises at the drive through until they invite me round. If they're going to get my order wrong, they can at least look me in the eye whilst doing so.

Q: Which director's body of work do you admire the most - Lynch or Cronenberg?

A: Lynch, if only for The Elephant Man.

Q: For a family day out - trip to the zoo or visit to a theme park?

A: Theme zoo. Get those pandas riding the coasters; that'll buck up their ideas.

Q: Do you prefer to read an ebook or a paperback?

A: Paperback, but I feel the wind on the way.

Q: If you were trapped in a dungeon with them and had only one stake, would you use it on Count Dracula, Carmilla Karnstein or yourself?

A: I'd say: "Let's be friends..." and try to understand their psychotic tendencies.

Q: Who do you consider the better writer - M. R. James or H. P. Lovecraft?

A: James for his grounding in reality.

Q: Whisky or brandy?

A: Whisky, and most definitely with no 'e'. I have a 30 year Bowmore. It's like an angel peeing on my tongue.

Q: Which are you looking forward to the most - the new Pirates of the Caribbean movie or Green Lantern?

A: Tough one, but Pirates, I think.

Q: Tate Modern or Tate Britain?

A: Tate Liverpool. I can go by bus.

Q: Which do you prefer to write - short story, novella or novel?

A: Short or novel, they're both fulfilling in different ways. Novellas I'm not fond of writing or reading; I've yet to find one that hasn't either overstayed a short's welcome, or not quite reached a full novel's depth.

Q: If you were to join the circus, would it be as clown, lion tamer or trapeze artiste?

A: All three at once. It would be worth the entrance money.

Q: The short stories of Angela Carter or those of Shirley Jackson?

A: Carter. I'm really a feminist with testicles.

Q: For starter - garlic bread or corn on the cob?

A: The main course! There's no messing about in our 'ouse.

Q: Dracula/Frankenstein - the Universal or Hammer versions?

A: I like Christopher Lee, so probably Hammer.

Q: Would you rather win a Hugo or a Stoker?

A: Neither. I don't need my ego stroked. Of course, I reserve the right to alter this should I ever be nominated.

Q: The film of your life should be directed by - Danny Boyle or Tim Burton?

A: Burton as the result would certainly be more fun.



Section items by date:

Pages in this section: